It’s been a while since I’ve posted an “I Hate Feeling Stupid” story. I just love it when daily life hands me another example to use in a post. Not!
On Wednesday I got invited (AKA coerced) into playing a game of corn hole. What could be easier than throwing a beanbag into a tiny hole about a hundred yards away, right? Okay, so I may or may not have exaggerated the distance. Funny how lack of ability helps a person do that, isn’t it?
Anyway, as you’ve probably already guessed, I was not born with natural beanbag-throwing abilities. To put it more succinctly…I stink at it. Thankfully, the game was just for fun. No trophies involved. No bets on the line. I was playing with my husband (who is used to my ineptness and yet, for some unknown reason, asked me to be on his team) against good friends…surrounded by other good friends who enjoy a good laugh. Who am I to deprive them of an opportunity for laughter?
Though I’ve learned, over the years, that it’s far less painful to join the crowd and laugh at yourself, there’s still a little pinch whenever I feel “less than.” And when my “less” affects someone else, it’s doubly painful. My hubby had no chance of winning with me as his partner. (I pray that’s not true of our life in general!)
So what do we do with our “I fell stupids”? One of the sweet friends I was playing against said something encouraging in the midst of the pitiful game: “She’s a writer. She doesn’t have to be good at this.” We all laughed. But it’s true…we’re all good at something and not a one of us can be good at everything. You’ve probably heard the expression “Play to your strengths.” In sports, this often means knowing your opponent’s weaknesses and targeting your strongest abilities against that weakness. But there are also more positive definitions out there. I like this one: “Give your attention and effort to things that you do well; give somebody the opportunity to do this.”
King Solomon understood failure. I love the encouragement in Proverbs 24:16—“The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again.”
We’ve got choices when we feel stupid. We can focus on our failure…pull the covers up over our heads, plug in those headphones, and put this message on repeat: “I stink. I’m stupid. I can’t do anything right. I’m a failure. I’ll never be good at anything. How come I can’t do _______ as well as _______?”
Or…we can stop comparisons before they start. Stop dwelling on the seven times we trip, and start looking at the times we brush ourselves off and get up again. Start focusing on the areas of life where we really don’t trip very often. We can say, “Hey, I’m good at _________; I don’t need to be good at everything.” And then we can compliment and encourage the person who does __________ better than we do.
What’s one thing you do well? What’s your __________?